Thank You

First and foremost, before I get into the rest of the post, I want to thank y'all for all the support of my last blog post. Holy goodness.

There was a pretty big level of fear in writing that post. The emotions that I was feeling are very hard to convey, and I was terrified of actually hitting "publish."  I don't feel that I got out exactly what I wanted to say in the best of words, but I seemed to have made the point that I was trying to make. I appreciate all the lovely comments, emails & words of encouragement and I am glad that I didn't piss off too many people. Most, at least the ones that chose to be vocal, understood where I was coming from & took no offense. I was happy to see so many sides of the issues presented, without judgement, while also witnessing a great conversation unfold.

Being pregnant right now is hard. Telling people that I loved was hard. There were tears, lots of tears, and I think that this second pregnancy, in it's very short life, is loads harder than the first one was (not from a physical or mental standpoint, but from a "member of the infertility community" standpoint.) Sometimes I have a hard time accurately expressing how I feel, and how I hope I am not making others feel.

So thank you. I mean it.

So, what else has been going on? Our life has been chaotic & hectic. The Army seems to be doing wonderful things to us right now (she says sarcastically). Remember that impending move? Well, the move may be happening, just not where we had originally planned. Or at all. Or maybe still to where we thought, just with a different job in tow. We have no idea. I don't want to divulge plans, or our hopes of plans, since nothing is concrete anymore, but I am hoping that things work out in our favor. Of course, this is the Army we are talking about which means nothing ever works out in our favor (see also: stuck in NC for the past seven years.) or in a timely manner.

So who knows.

Baby-wise, I have nothing to report for the most part. I will be nine weeks this week, and haven't had much to show for it. I have had a couple days of nausea here and there & headaches early on that have, for the most part, gone away. Aside from that, my symptoms have been minimal. It's nerve-wracking and worrisome, but I have no reason to believe that anything is going wrong. It's hard to believe that we are at this point already, but at the same time, feels like we have barely made a dent. Is nine weeks really worth celebrating? I was looking back at some of my posts from this mark last time, when I was pregnant with Lucas, and it was hard reading how much sadness and despair I had (read here, here & here). I remember it, too, being completely terrified of what MIGHT happen. I felt that way for a long time, through most of my pregnancy, never truly feeling like I could relax & just enjoy it. Honestly, I never did.

There were other factors in that aside from the fear & worry (depression, lots of physical pain) but they were the main focus.I'm trying to NOT do that this time around. It's tough, I'm not going to lie. This pregnancy has already been different & worries aside, I feel in a much better place, even now.

We are ALMOST finished remodeling our kitchen (just in time for us to move). We need to slap some paint up on the walls & we will, for the most part, be done. I can't wait to share some before & after photos. SO different than when we moved into the house five years ago.

So that's that. Fingers crossed that the Army gives us good news. If I don't hear something this week, my head might explode. And nobody wants that to happen (I don't, at least!) 

First Birthday Prep*

It's hard to believe that in just a few short weeks, my little guy will be celebrating his first birthday.

I mean, really hard to believe.

So hard, in fact, that I get choked up from time to time thinking about the fact that we are getting ready to embark on this celebrating. I won't talk too much about it, because I want to save all of it for his one year post, but in the mean time, it's safe to say that we have started planning for the festivities!

I have been to some pretty extravagant first birthday parties before, but I promise we are not going that route. For starters, we don't have a ton of room in our tiny home! But also, we want to keep it as simple as possible with close friends. A small, quaint gathering for some yummy food, beverages & celebrating the awesome kid that we have had the joy of getting to know this past year!

When we originally started talking about his first birthday, we wanted to do a Star Wars theme. Because, well, his name is Lucas. And it would have been cool. But I'm picky & I couldn't find the type of decorations I wanted, so we scrapped that. And instead, we are going with a Mustache Bash! I thought it would be fun and of course, Pinterest had a ton of great ideas. Most of the actual links were broken (so if you know where any of these came from, let me know so I can give proper credit) except for this one, but we are definitely getting on the ball with making this as adorable as possible. I can't wait for the big day!

Home Improvement: New Patio!

About a year ago, M and I decided to take out the existing deck that we had attached to our house, and eventually replace it with some new steps and a patio.

The deck that we had was high, resulting in ZERO privacy because you could see us over the fence. Our dogs would actually get up on the railing and sit there, so that they could see out into the neighborhood, that's how high it was. The deck was small in size, and wasn't very functional. There was barely room for a grill, let alone anything other then one camping chair. Not really ideal for entertaining of any sort. Plus, with the deck where it was, it left little room between the deck and the fence [our back door is actually on the side of the house], making it nearly impossible to get anything bigger than the lawn mower in the back.

So, we ripped out the deck with grand plans in mind to open up the space. When we ripped out the deck, we found a ton of water damage to the house. We would have had to put new siding on that side of the house, so we ended up just spending the money and residing out entire house with new, better, prettier and longer lasting siding. The patio sort of got put to the way-side.

BUT, this year we are finally getting things done. And by we, I mean my darling husband who is out there shoveling dirt and dumping rocks while I stay in the nice, air conditioned home. Hey. Somebody has to watch the baby!

He has been working his butt of to dig out a 12x40 foot area that will eventually be our new cement patio. And I cannot tell you how friggin' excited I am for this!! We have been in this house for five years, and I always dread having a lot of guests over, due to the simple fact that I have nowhere outside to entertain people. But the dirt has been dug, and we got $400 worth of gravel delivered last Friday, which is slowly but surely making it's way to it's new home where it will be the foundation for the cement, which will come at a later date.

Growing up, we spent a lot of time in our backyard. A LOT. And one of my favorite memories is eating summer dinners out on the patio furniture with the family, enjoying the summer weather. I want to do that here, and I want to be comfortable having people over when we want to. So while M is working on getting the area prepped for the cement people, I'm having fun looking at all the sweet patio furniture that I am sure I can't afford.

And maybe a fire pit. :)

And a place to grow some herbs!

Oh the possibilities are endless. I already have some excellent ideas stashed away on Pinterest for when the time comes, and I am totally looking forward to creating a great little oasis for us to hang out in!

When Life Throws You A Curve*

The past two weeks in our household have been pretty rough, as my husband and I have been dealing with some personal family issues. I've talked about it on twitter -- because, well, a girl needs an outlet -- but my husband will be flying back to Portland today to spend the next two and a half weeks with his family, until we can get some things figured out.

I realize that kind of sounds misleading, so I will say that we, as a husband & wife, are fine. But some health issues with extended family are causing us a lot of concern. If I need to fly out I will, but because of the pregnancy he doesn't really want me traveling and being under the extra stress. So here is where I stay until absolutely needed.

I will say that the outpouring of support from our friends and family has been amazing. My husband is very much an "I can carry the weight of the world alone on my shoulders" type of guy & I have been trying to tell him that we have an amazing support group both here and afar, & we need to utilize that & let people help us. I am forever grateful to the friends who have listened to me talk about what's going on, what I'm thinking & how I'm feeling, and it just proves to me that there are just some people in our lives that may not be blood, but are not any less family than the real thing. And for that, I will never be able to repay them or thank them properly.

So I will be solo for the next two and a half weeks unless I absolutely need to fly to Portland. I'm hoping that things work out and that it won't be needed anytime soon [*fingers crossed*] but it's nerve wracking to think otherwise. So in the meantime I'm hoping to just keep as busy as I can and get some things in order in the house. I have a SERIOUS pantry reorganization project that needs to happen, and I have some friends coming over next weekend to help move some furniture, so that I can get started on painting the nursery [yay!] & getting the old office/new guestroom in order & livable condition. I'm hoping to bust out some creativeness & if I come up with anything spectacular, I will be sure to share with you all! On top of that, I have some fall decoration plans that I am hoping to get accomplished.

All of this leads up to the well baby ultrasound the day after M returns. I'm excited to see the little guy/gal & no! We are not finding out the sex of the baby! Surprise! There are a lot of reasons for that, and we will get into that in another post! But for now I'm just prepping as much as I can! I'm looking forward to getting the nursery started & have some found some great prints for the walls that I may be ordering soon. I can't wait to document the process.

I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend! It's sunny but low to mid 60's here this weekend, which is a NICE break from the 80 degree weather we are still having. Gotta love the South!

Farming With Fletcher*

I want to take a quick minute and pass along this awesome site to all of you. My good good & totally amazing friend, Cortney, writes at Farming with Fletcher, a blog dedicated to all things green, self-sustaining and healthy.

According to Cort's "About Us,"

We currently live in a state out west somewhere between the plains and the mountains, which was very much unplanned! He is retired Army (Infantry- Hooah!), now working at a local high school. She is working as a lab director, not using her ecology degree particularly well. We have a 3-5 year plan, of which the goals are to buy 10+/- acres of land, build a home, build a chicken coop, plant a garden, learn to can, manage the woods, raise heirloom birds and goats. Maybe even a pig or a horse. We have visions of a cold cellar full of veggies, a pantry full of canned goods, homemade soap and cheese, and the ability to live sustainably. And be ready for any zombie attacks or the end of the world- whichever comes first!

We want to be greener. We want to be healthier. We want to be self sustaining... or at least as close to it as we can get. We want OUR version of the American Dream (and it doesn't involve working till we are 70 and being in debt up to our eyeballs). In short, our goal is the live the dream and make a working, thriving, sustainable homestead for ourselves. Sooner, rather than later!

Cortney is all about being as green as possible. She makes her own deodorant. She makes amazing quilts out of old, worn tshirts. She writes about the awfulness that is the meat industry. Her posts are insightful and well thought-out, and I want to be just like her when I grow up.

She has a plan, and she's working towards her version of the American Dream -- something we can all admire. I highly suggest checking out her page for all her updates, and hopefully you can take away some of the great things that I have.

Also, be sure to check out the section to hear all about Fletcher. As an animal lover and someone who lost a pup near and dear to my heart, its worth a read. Fletcher's Farm is an excellent way to carry on the memory of a loved pooch!

So go. Now. Check her out. And make sure you follow her for all the updates!

Headboards

I have been in a serious nesting phase the last couple of weeks, and I am wanting to make some serious improvements to our home. I've let my darling husband get away with his bachelor ways for too long now [uh, the chrome TV stand seriously needs to go] and I feel like I'm failing in my wifely duties by not sprucing things up a bit. I've painted some walls here & there, but nothing major has been accomplished.

My first big task is going to be the master bedroom. It's really sort of just a *place where we sleep.* I want it to be a sanctuary. We currently have an old dresser that matches our old bed [now in the guest bedroom] and a king sized mattress on two metal railings. That's it. No paint on the walls, icky carpet, everything.

I have figured that the headboard is where I need to start, and then I can work around that. We spend so much time in that room, I want it to be a place to retreat to. Right now it's just another room that holds all my dirty clothes. Awesome.

However, we're on a budget, which means I need to find some cheap yet chic alternatives to our home improvement project. These are some of the alternatives I have found thus far:



This is merely a piece of plywood board that has been sanded down, stained & propped. It has some possibilities.



I have always *loved* the rustic headboard look. This is done with two window panels. They removed the glass, threw some board up in the back for safety & then applied some fabric into the square panels with some spray adhesive. And I LOVE that their night stands are shelves on the wall. Genius!



Love. love. love. So easy. So chic.



This is actually what I think I have been leaning towards. Something easy & yet extremely personal. I've considered doing a variation of this but with some of my own designed art work pieces mixed in with the personal pieces. I would love to throw some skinny book shelves on the sides of the beds serve as night stands [storage & practicality!].

What do you think? Any great ideas for do it yourself headboards?