Sixteen Months

I had every intention of doing a fifteen month update on the little guy because I haven't written anything about him really since his one year. That was the goal.

But, fifteen months has come and gone and now we are into our sixteenth month. SIXTEEN MONTHS you guys. I just have no words.

Lucas has turned into a full-fledged toddler. It's amazing how much he grows and changes daily and sometimes it overwhelms me how quick it is all happening. At his 15 month checkup he weighed just about 28 pounds. He's a big boy for his age and I love it. But with big boy status comes big boy changes. I am typically not a fan of gender stereotypes but this kid is all boy all the time. There is nothing sensitive about him. He loves his cars & trucks, and any chance dad is home to toss him around, he begs for it. In the air. On the couch. Rolling around the floor. Outside? He's happiest with a stick and some dirt. It's hard for me seeing my little guy want to be so rough & tough, but at the same time Lucas & M are building such an awesome relationship. It's fun to watch (although I do have to close my eyes from time to time).

Sleep has started to become an issue, in that we are transitioning from two naps a day to one nap a day. It's been a fine line figuring out what time exactly he needs to sleep as to not keep him up super late at night or up super early in the morning. Last week he was up until after 10pm. Saturday morning? 4am. It's too much for this mama. So we are tweaking and adjusting as necessary in order to perfect things as much as possible. You know, until it all changes again. Toddler sleep is tricky and if there is one thing about my kid, it's that he loves his routine. If we are 20 minutes off for ANYTHING, you will know it, so this adjustment period has been hard on him and trying for me. But at some point, we will figure it out.

On top of the sleep issues, we are also battling food issues. It was so great when he was starting out on solids, and the seven or eight months that followed. He would eat anything I put in front of him and some days I couldn't give him enough. I thought to myself, how wonderful! I have such a great eater! I am SO LUCKY that he is not picky about food! GO US!

Yeah. About that.

Proteins? Good luck. Vegetable? NO WAY. It's been a frustrating challenge trying to make sure my kid eats a balanced meal, even on a week to week basis. He will eat fruits all day long, and grains are an obvious win as well (who doesn't love a good carb?) but these days, that's about it. I offer, and it typically ends up on the floor. I hide, and he avoids no matter how much he typically loves what I am offering. One meal, he will LOVE something, and the next refuse to touch it. It's tricky & frustrating all at the same time. I worry about his health while also worrying that he's getting enough to sustain his growing body. I get sad when I think that Cheerios are his only source of iron because he refuses all other things. So I'm on a mission to fix the issue, AS BEST I CAN, and change things up.

I admit that as a working mom, we get stagnant in our meal choices. He's hungry long before I get around to making dinner, so typically he gets thrown things that are easy and convenient. My goal in the coming weeks is to experiment with some new toddler friendly recipes, that will hopefully hide the good stuff that he refuses to eat, while also satisfying whatever pallet he has at the moment. We introduced him to smoothies recently, which seemed to be a hit, so we will offer those on occasion. Once I start my adventures in stay at home mommyhood in a few weeks, this will be easier. I will have time to create and plan. But in the mean time, I need to find a solution that also works quickly. I see some mass cooking on weekends in my very, very near future.

Sleep and food struggles aside, this kid is amazing. He is at such a fun age where he is learning and growing. He wants to be so independent, but at the same time loves coming to me for the occasional snuggle. He melts my heart on a daily basis.

Adios, First Trimester!

I feel like I need to document part of this pregnancy for the simple fact of putting this all in a photo book some day for our kids. I don't want to totally fall into the classic "first child gets everything, second child gets forgotten about" syndrome so I really am only planning on documenting at the end of each trimester.

So basically, this is purely for me. Feel free to skip over it. :)

Side note: it is funny how different this whole experience is from last time, not just the physical (I'll get to that in a bit) but the mental and, well, just everything else. I saw a hilarious article on BuzzFeed today about the difference between first time and experienced parents that had me giggling pretty hard. I don't necessarily consider myself experienced by any stretch of the imagination, but we definitely have gone into this so much more relaxed and "whatever" than we did the first time around. No books. No planning. Nothing. Granted, we are only 15 weeks in, but, you know.

People keep mentioning to us that we are going to need so much stuff if we have a girl, and what will we register for??! Honestly? No we won't and I don't know. One of the great things about not finding out what baby number one was is having things that are gender neutral. And in all honesty, even if they WEREN'T gender neutral, I really don't care. I'll throw my kid in a blue onesie all day long. I also HATE pink.

Ok, that's not true. I love pink, sometimes, and in small doses. Like, on my nails. Or my cell phone cover. But clothes? NOPE. Nope. Nope. Nope. Ruffles? Hell no. So we basically won't be registering for anything, because I honestly can't think of a single thing that we will need. Two things come to mind -- a double stroller (BOB ALL THE WAY!) and the kit for our crib that will turn it into a bed at some point. Yup. That's it.

That was a long side note.

As far as this pregnancy has gone, it's been shockingly easy, for the most part, since day one. I've had some nausea here and there, and some wicked stomach issues I had during my first trimester with Lucas are showing their ugly faces coming into my second trimester with this kid. But so far -- nothing really, and I am grateful for that. I hated being pregnant the first time around. I know you're not supposed to say that, but I truly hated it. I had HORRIBLE pelvic pain, was sick and seriously depressed. Feeling the baby move was the only thing I truly enjoyed about the process. I can't particularly say that I'm enjoying the process this time around much more, but I am grateful for a seemingly easier stretch.

But let me tell you. Chasing around a toddler while being pregnant is no joke. There's no going home and going to bed at 6pm like I did last time. My poor husband thinks I'm this bump on the log because I have zero energy to do anything productive, but he's amazing and supportive anyways, catering to me more than is necessary (but don't tell him that!)

All in all, aside from the whole working full time & chasing a toddler in my free time thing, it's been pretty simple. We've had two ultrasounds to date & last week at our appointment we heard the heart beat on the dopplar. I go in August 7th for the anatomy scan & baby willing, we will find out the gender. It's crazy that we are already at this point!

Stress, Stress & More Stress

The Army. I really don't know what to say to you right now.

I'm beginning to think that this move/PCS will never happen. Or if it does, it will be at the last minute to somewhere we weren't expecting or preparing for. A total clusterfuck.

Once again, everything is up in the air. We finally got things sorted out -- a new class date followed by a new report date in October -- and the owner of the home we were going to rent was very gracious and told us she would hold the home for us until we got there. Things were moving along.

And then some Colonel higher up decided he didn't want to sign a piece of paper. A PIECE OF PAPER. This document is the needed document to allow my husband to attend the school in August. If he DOESN'T attend this school, he cannot report to his new assignment. No new assignment  means no PCS. M's 1st SGT is trying to pull some strings with Branch to see about getting our orders cancelled all together and/or send us somewhere else. But of course, everybody is on leave right now, so answers aren't happening. On top of that, the entire Brigade is heading to training at the end of the month -- for four weeks -- essentially leaving us high and dry until they come back. This of course coincides with the time M needs to be at school. I think at this point we are banking on us not going to GA, because we don't seem to be getting any answers.

In the mean time, I gave my notice at work. Starting mid-August, I will be out of a job. The reasons for doing so were mostly out of my control. I got backed into a corner and ultimately, didn't really have any choice. Can we say completely unsupportive of the military lifestyle? Yup. That would be the polite way to describe how I feel about things. But this means no income for me, and staying at home. I know that there are a lot of mothers out there who would kill for this opportunity, and I know that I will enjoy it. But I've mentioned before that I enjoy working. I like my career. I like having a purpose. I WANT to work. I also enjoy the lifestyle we are able to have with two incomes. While I don't necessarily want to be here where I am anymore, I DO want to do something else.

I honestly don't know what is going to happen. I am desperately searching for companies that allow telecommuting in the Public Relations/Communications field, but I'm struggling to find anybody/anything/anyone. I would love to work from home, and therefore take my job with me if and when we ever leave here, but this seems to be a long shot. M is keeping his head as cool as possible (although I think he is more frustrated with all of this than I am) and financially, we will be ok. It's just not an ideal situation.

I'm doing everything I can not to pull my hair out, but this whole situation is making me stabby. Bitter. Angry. Annoyed. All in all, I'm not a real joy to be around these days. It's times like this I really could use a LARGE glass of wine ...